What's in a Name?

My 10-year-old son is having an existential crisis of sorts.

He's trying to decide whether to start calling my wife and me “Mom and Dad,” or continue calling us “Mommy and Daddy.” For the past few years he's referred to us as “my mom and dad” when talking about us to others, but still uses “Mommy and Daddy” to our faces.

I told him to call us whatever he feels comfortable with, but to please not call me “Pop.” He doesn't see it that way. He thinks he needs to make a conscious effort to start using “Mom and Dad” because “Mommy and Daddy” sound childish; he doesn't want the kids at school to hear him say it because he's sure none of them say it anymore.

Using the right terminology, at the right time and for the right reasons, is one of the most important elements of effective writing.

For instance, on a corporate blog I read recently, one of the commenters was irritated about the use of “anagrams” in another person's comments. Fortunately, the CEO realized the commenter meant to say “acronyms” and responded appropriately. This is an unfortunate example of a malapropism, and many people are prone to such use of incorrect words. I once had a friend who, in describing how to get a client's attention, told me that he tried to establish a repertoire with the person first.

I always thought repertoire was like a bag of tricks, a list of songs or soliloquy or some other product one can pull out of a hat when the occasion arises. Not according to my old friend. I never had the heart to tell him I think he means “rapport.”

Unfortunately, there are other misuses of words that are less obvious but just as damaging to your credibility as a writer (or a speaker).

I often hear people saying “infer” when they really mean “imply,” for instance.

Although malapropisms do create the impression of ignorance, at least most of us know what the speaker is actually trying to say. Communication suffers more when someone uses a word that could be the right one, but isn't.

This is especially problematic when discussing topics of a policy or legal nature. As a corporate communicator I'm occasionally frustrated when people along the approval chain ask me to change something that has nothing to do with their area of expertise, like whether a speech should begin with “I'm happy to be here” as opposed to “It's my pleasure to be here.”

On the other hand, I have encountered situations where using alternate terminology to describe a policy decision means something entirely different from the idea we're trying to convey. I'm grateful to the numerous experts in my workplace who take the time to explain their rationale when they ask for changes of this sort. This knowledge only makes me better at my job. Fortunately, I've also developed pretty good instincts for determining when something could be improved by rewording it and when it needs to be left as it is.

The tendency to use “fancy” words can also lead to poor word choices, simply because many people don't have a strong grasp of the nuances of English. For instance, I was in a meeting once where somebody was describing what he called “substantive” change. The ranking executive in the room asked him whether he meant “substantive or substantial.” Now this individual had a disturbing habit of trying to show people up in meetings, but his point was a good one - there is a difference. The fact the person who who used the term wasn't actually sure whether he meant “substantive” or “substantial” hurt his credibility.

I have a few simple rules that I try to follow. One is that if I run a sentence or a word past someone I consider to be reasonably intelligent and that person doesn't know what I'm saying, then the fault is mine, not his; I'm the one who needs to find a better way to say it. Another rule is that I personally never use a word if I'm not sure I know what it means, except as a quote.

Good writing is not about impressing people with the size of your vocabulary, but about using the right words for the circumstances and your audience. If you use words incorrectly, your own credibility suffers. If you use words your audience doesn't understand, then it just goes to show that you haven't done your research. And if you hear someone else use an obvious malapropism, just let it go.